Of Mice and Men

August 3, 2016

In the August 1 issue of the Weekly Standard you will find my most recent Casual column on my bachelor week—a once-a-year event, in which my wife and kids are away while I am here working. As I mention, it’s an overrated experience when I overindulge in food and drink. And frankly I don’t like being alone. There is also an anecdote about the time I came home and had to bludgeon a mouse to death using a nine-iron. Barry Jackson of Gilbert, Ariz., recently chimed in, however, with this advice:

I would have used a driver, for impact and distance. A nine-iron should only be used when elevation is crucial, like if you need to put the critter through a high window. Whatever club is used, be sure the mouse has indeed expired. He may not have been alone. His companion may come along and try to revive him with … wait for it … mouse-to-mouse resuscitation.

Rimshot!

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